And more on that #3...

I was taking a bath today.  One of my very favorite things to do.  And reading BabyTalk magazine.  I thought I was being sneaky...until the door opened and Chris and Caleb popped in to see what was taking me so long.  And there is an article about the at-home mom.  I read this page

 

This page about what stay at home moms love.  And I got a lump in my throat.  No schedules and deadlines, breastfeeding all day, naps, going to the park in the middle of the day, and best of all "time to smell the coffee (or read Goodnight Moon 20 times a day)."  Sign me up.  Now, quick!  Where's the pen?

There isn't a day that's passed since October, when I returned to work, that I haven't grabbed my phone to turn off the alarm and nurse Caleb again before going to work that I haven't thought about how much I wish I could stay in bed with my jammied baby until at least 7 (late these days!) and spend the day watching Baby Einstein, reading Brown Bear, Brown Bear, taking a nap with Caleb, and spooning prunes into his sweet little mouth and then wiping it off his hands when we're done.  There isn't a Saturday that has gone by that I haven't pretended I'm a stay at home mom and this is just another day at home for me.  There isn't a Sunday that has gone by that I haven't dreading seeing that sun settle down for bed that I haven't felt a painful twinge, knowing that the next 5 days will be stressful, draining, and keep me away from my baby for way more hours then I want to be away from him. 

So I am signing off here now, Sunday night, 8:39 PM, and going upstairs to snuggle with my sweet baby.  Forget the crib, I want to get in as many snuggles as I can before that alarm goes off, and I have to slip out of the bed to go to work.

Hello Again!

Oh how naive I was to think that I could effortlessly take pictures, blog, work full time, breastfeed, pump, etc, etc daily for the first year of Caleb's life.  Why didn't someone tell me I was setting myself up for failure?  The days turned to weeks, the weeks into months, and now here I sit, with my 6 1/2 month sweetie in the jumperoo and a blog with a sweet baby face from waaaay back in September!  I've decided to get my feet wet and start blogging again.  I am no longer promising a daily photo and post.  Not yet anyway.  But I do want to try to post at least weekly (ish) so that I will have this blog to look back on and give myself time to reflect and click out some thoughts on the keyboard.  Reflecting is good. 

So here are some reflections...

1.) Being a Mama is hard work.  Wear-you-out-and-make-you-pour-coffee-in-a-tall-clear-glass-when-you-meant-to-pour-it-into-a-mug-exhausting.  But it is also overfill-your-heart-until-it-squeezes-tears-outta-your-eyes fulfilling.  I love every second of it.

2.) I am so so very lucky to have a hubby that loves being a Daddy as much as I love being a Mama.  A Daddy that has since taken a squealing babe out of the jumperoo and into the Baby Bjorn, a frequent favorite spot for Caleb.  Man-what would I do without him?

3.) I think that women should have every opportunity available to them that men have.   I think it's great that women are climbing corporate ladders every day.  That they are going to jobs that fulfill them.  I'm not sure I am one of those women...I want more than anything to be a stay at home Mama to my guy.  Afterall, with a face like this who wouldn't want to stay home and play all day?